Antony, Wilson's Musical Director for Antsy Malone — The Musical, has become bored and disillusioned by the lack of progress on the aforementioned production.
He says that so far there are more posters than songs, and unless Wilson puts in some more effort he will be directing his creative skills elsewhere.
In fact, he has already started composing some Football Chants and Songs for the Bees' fledgling footy team, Uckfield Bees.
They're not quite 'Three Lions' or 'You'll Never Walk Alone' but they're not bad... for a toy anteater!
He's in the dining room trying them out on TT — in a style more reminiscent of Nat King Cole than a footy crowd — while channeling Liberace, judging by the candelabra!
Here's one of Antony's Football Anthems:
❝Have you seen the Uckfield Bees?
They fly with the ball between their knees!
They play with all their heart and soul,
Then drop the ball inside the goal!❞
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This morning on The Danny Baker Show (BBC Radio 5 Live) Danny said that he'd recently trapped and killed a Hornet! Everyone is afraid it might have been Uncle Zoltan.
I've emailed the show to ask, but received no reply as yet...
Wilson has just shown me yet ANOTHER Antsy Malone Poster — he seems to be turning them out far more quickly than he's writing songs for the show.
I asked him about this, and he said he's a bit 'musically and lyrically blocked' and that what would REALLY free-up his creative side and get his euphonic juices flowing would be the holiday to 'Weston Super Market' that I promised him before Xmas.
He's right — I DID promise him a holiday once the weather warmed up, and the time has probably come to make good on that promise, I suppose.
The holiday will have to wait until after his birthday, though, as I've got a special event planned for that!
In the meantime, he'd be very grateful if you'd print out the poster and stick it up on the noticeboard where you work.
Or near the water cooler.
Or in your car window.
Or get it printed on a T-shirt...
This morning Wilson saw a news item about Adele being top of the Rock Richlist, with a net worth of $125M — that's about 70,633,000,000 Costa Rican Colón!
Wilson, on the other hand, is still waiting for his first PRS cheque.
Why not cheer him up by listening once again to his Music Video? You can even download it, if you like!
http://youtu.be/3XvG-IxEURU
http://antwars2.blogspot.co.uk/
Today is The Bees' Third Wedding Anniversary — doesn't time fly, eh?
Unlike human weddings with their gifts of Paper, Cotton... Silver... Gold etc, apparently all Bee wedding anniversaries are designated Honey Anniversaries — which I suppose makes gift-buying a lot simpler...and cheaper!
Wilson organised a party in the garden, and after a lot of music, waggle-dancing and booze Tiny Toy gave a very funny speech.
Well, I say 'speech,' but basically it was a lot of one-liners told in very quick succession:
❝WELCOME, everybody, to Polly and Billi's THIRD WEDDING ANNIVERSARY!
❝Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage. He didn't have to hear about all the men she could have married... and she didn't have to hear about how well his mother cooked.
❝Always remember you’re unique... just like everyone else.
❝I dressed my dog up as a cat for Halloween. Now he won’t come when I call him.
❝My girlfriend told me to take a spider out instead of killing it. We went and had some drinks. Cool guy. Wants to be a lawyer.
❝Dyslexic man walks into a bra...
❝I went to the corner shop — bought four corners.
❝A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here."
❝I was having dinner with Garry Kasparov and there was a check tablecloth. It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
❝I received some bad news whilst eating a curry at an Indian Restaurant. My naan had slipped into a korma.
❝If you don't know what introspection is – you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
❝We know the location of the Big Apple, but do we know where the Minneapolis?
❝They're always telling me to live my dreams. But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for...
❝Thank you! Thank you! I've been Tiny Toy, and you've been a wonderful audience! Happy Anniversary, everyone! Goodnight!❞
Hello, we are Polly and Billi The Bees, and this is our Guest Blog!
Usually we blog about the terrible things that are happening to bees, who are being poisoned all round the world, but today we thought, 'Life's Too Short!' (especially what with all the poisoning) so we decided to tell you about something wonderful we've just discovered: Football*!
We started playing football with our children a few days ago, after Billi saw a programme on TV about bees playing football and, although you do get a bit muddy, it's great fun!
Billy has discovered that there's a Ladies' Football Team called London Bees.
Obviously, a perfect name for our (mostly) ladies' team would be: UCKFIELD BEES, so we've decided that will be our team name from now on.
We've got Wilson to take a Team Photo for fans and supporters of our team, and Antony says that when he gets time he'll write some football chants and songs for our supporters to sing and shout.
Wilson has called his photograph of us "Team Photo" and suggests you print it out poster size and pin it on your bedroom wall, as apparently this is the traditional thing to do with Team Photos!
Anyway, we've been The Bees and, until next time: BEEEEEEEEE GOOD!
PS: There's still no news of Uncle Zoltan — please keep your eyes peeled and let us know if you see him!
*Football = soccer, if you're American.
Wilson has just launched a NEW 'Limited Edition' Antsy Malone poster — on sale to raise 'seed money' for Antsy Malone — The Musical. He assured me that this poster will become 'extremely collectible' in no time at all, adding that I should expect to see it turning up on Antiques Roadshow within months. Hmmm. 😕
I asked him what this so-called Seed Money was needed for; he shrugged and replied, 'Well, necessities that are required before the production is launched. Things like, oh, I don't know... Greasepaint. Scenery. Gin.'
In other news, tomorrow is the day of The Bees' Blog, and Billi tells me it will be unlike any of their previous blogs.
So, don't say you haven't been warned!
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If you are a member of the Mailing List or the Wilson Vermilingua Appreciation Society on Facebook, I must apologise for today's post being late. To make up, expect one of Wilson's Souvenir Antsy Malone — The Musical souvenir badges to pop into your inbox or Appreciation Society account soon!
