31/05/2014

Not 'mad' after all...

Wilson has told the bees about the visit by Mad Uncle Zortan, relating to them the tragic circumstances of his early life which have resulted in his current eccentric behaviour. 

Everyone agreed that it was very sad and that henceforth he should be referred to only as Differently-Abled Uncle Zortan.

W then caused some offence by asking the bees whether their baby could do any tricks.


30/05/2014

Johnson is very pleased!

Johnson is delighted with the new group wedding photo with his parents! As he put it to Wilson, 'You'd never know I wasn't actually there!'

In other news, it turns out that ladybirds, visually at least, are not immensely sophisticated, but are quite easily pleased. 


29/05/2014

Wedding photo reshoot

Diesel, who lives a quiet life and doesn't get out much, got quite overexcited meeting Johnson yesterday. 

As an emergency measure Wilson dropped half an Ambien into his bowl, then ordered a relaxation tape on eBay for him.

Johnson was a bit put out not to be in his parents' wedding group photo so Wilson offered to shoot it again with him included. 

W propped up the wedding photograph against a bottle of ant gin while little Johnson posed in front; then he loaded his last pack of film into his trusty Polaroid. 


28/05/2014

Diesel gets to meet someone!

Wilson has introduced Johnson to Diesel the Goldfish, and vice versa.

Diesel was very excited by this. He doesn't get to meet many people...


27/05/2014

The wedding photos have arrived!

There was much excitement this morning when the postman brought a big envelope addressed to the bees! 

Billi opened it and withdrew their Wedding Group Photograph — everyone crowded round and secretly admired themselves in it while saying how good everyone else looked…



26/05/2014

New addition to the family!

Under intense questioning by Wilson, Polly and Billi revealed that they have adopted a baby! Their progeny is a young ladybird whom they have named Johnson.

Billi has grown the colour out of her fur and says that she is now ready to renounce her past life of hedonistic clubbing and settle down to a life of devoted motherhood with Polly.

Well, I don't think any of us were expecting that!


25/05/2014

The bees are back in town!

This morning Wilson and I were sitting in the garden while he ate his breakfast of coffee and croissants with ants, discussing whether his Wilson Vermilingua OBE Museum of Old Stuff and a Robot would be eligible for a Lottery grant. 

He was telling me how a few thousand tax-free would enable him to buy some new exhibits and give the walls a fresh coat of creosote, when suddenly the bees flew in, home from their honeymoon… and they were not alone!