01/03/2014

Doppelganger

Wilson carried the two bees into the kitchen, where they sat on the table like identical twins. 

'One of these,' Wilson announced gravely, 'is a Doppelgänger! That is a very bad omen. I shall telephone Mr Derek Acorah, if I can find his number, and ask him for advice. Then I shall test both bees with my ectoplasm detector to see which is the real Polly-B.'

'You've got an ectoplasm detector?' I asked, incredulously.
In answer he raised a long kebab skewer and made a jabbing motion. Both bees gulped nervously.

I made a suggestion: 'Why don't you just ask both of them which is the real Polly-B, then ask her where the other one came from?'

'That could work too, I suppose,' W replied doubtfully, and raised his eyebrows questioningly towards the two plush insects.

'Well, I'm Polly-B,' answered one, 'and this is my new friend. We met while we were out practicing at the Luge Track!'


26/02/2014

A psychic materialisation...

Wilson towed his Luge home from the Luge Track, still despondent about the lack of snow. But when he parked it in the dining room he was astonished to notice two Polly-Bs sitting on it. 

He ran in to me saying that he had concussion following a Luge-related accident and was seeing double, but when I followed him to the dining room I was able to confirm that there were in fact two Polly-Bs. 

I have no explanation for this incomprehensible and frankly baffling manifestation! 

Of all the possible interpretations of this event, Wilson suspects it is a psychic materialisation. Why does this not surprise me?


24/02/2014

Awaiting snow...

Today is beautiful: sunny, warm and springlike! 

Wilson has chosen today, the warmest day of the year so far, to go to what he calls 'the Luge track' — a grassy slope at the end of the road — to await snowfall so he can start practicing.

He spent a long time gazing anxiously at the sky waiting for snow, but was disappointed.

When he got home he told me the weather was 'Rubbish!' 

Worryingly, though, he says he has a foolproof backup plan. I so hope it doesn't involve hiring a snow machine on my VISA card.


23/02/2014

A miscalculation with the calendar...

I was roused from my bed before dawn this morning by Wilson calling up from the garden: 'Hurry up, New Dad! Quick, or we'll be late!'

Due to some miscalculation, he thought today was International Ant Day, and he was waiting ready with all his equipment to celebrate its rites in the traditional way. 

It's not like him at all — he's usually so organised and efficient — but I expect he was just overexcited. 
International Ant Day is celebrated on the first Sunday in March, as everyone knows!