02/03/2013

Treat jostles treat!


Wilson is still waiting to hear from the Vatican about his job application, and now he's realised that not only is Red Nose Day only a couple of weeks away, National Ant Day is next Monday! 
He's training for both events simultaneously… by sleeping a lot while wearing his red nose. He's given me strict instructions that if the Vatican should Skype him I'm to wake him and ensure that he removes his red nose before speaking to the Cardinals. He thinks that even though it's for charity, talking to a prospective employer while wearing what he describes as a comedic prosthetic hooter might seem disrespectful.
He's probably right. I've never seen any Pope wearing a red nose.


CHECK THIS OUT!


February has been a very busy month for Wilson Vermilingua OBE!
I've just uploaded the fourteenth monthly volume of Ant Wars II: February 2013 so you can catch up on anything you've missed.
Please tell all your friends, as it is Wilson's stated ambition for his life story to be, as he puts it, "As Popular as the Pope!".  Incidentally, Wilson has sent off a job application to be the new Pope! If he is the successful applicant, he will be as popular as the Pope!

You can download it or read it online at:
http://issuu.com/friendlydragon/docs/ant_wars_ii_february_2013

You can now SUBSCRIBE to Wilson's blog by email!

The BLOG is right here: http://antwars2.blogspot.co.uk/

You can TRANSLATE Wilson's blog into other languages!

You can COMMENT on Wilson's blog — and he'd love to hear from you!

Photographs of the lovely WILSON are by Tamanduagirl at 
http://www.livingwithanteaters.com/ and are used by kind permission.

28/02/2013

New Pope!


Since Wilson wasn't after all killed in the recent asteroid near-miss, he's just realised that he might still be in with a chance at being the new Pope! He's fine-tuning his letter of application before emailing it to the Vatican. To be on the safe side, he's writing it in Latin by means of an on-line Latin translation bot.
He'd better get a move on – I think the Cardinals have already convened!


27/02/2013

Things to do in Worthing


I found this note this morning. 
I've never thought Wilson was overly interested in windmills or museums, let alone churches and a pond. About the most interesting thing to do on the list is to visit Brighton, and we've both been there loads of times.
Once Wilson gets a bee in his bonnet it's very difficult to change his mind. 
I expect I shall find out what this is all about one day…


26/02/2013

A floating gin palace...


Wilson has decided that no holiday is a proper "Holiday" unless one arrives in style, by which he means by air or sea. As Worthing is very close to Shoreham Airport, he thinks we should fly there for our holiday. 
This would mean driving to Gatwick Airport to get a flight to Shoreham, then hiring a car to get to Worthing. Since Gatwick is further from home than Worthing, I have vetoed this idea, so W is now researching boat charter. 
He says that it's not a "real" boat unless it's got a helicopter pad. He thinks we should be able to charter a floating gin palace like the one in the photo for 'about £50 per day… although that might not include use of the helicopter.'
I have my doubts that we'd get a row-it-yourself dingy for that!


24/02/2013

Worthing is still ahead!


Wilson's friend Cathy suggested that he might like to holiday in Africa, pointing out that there are many, many species of ant living there, some up to 4cm long! Another friend, @highwulf, said that New York was a clear winner, as he'd be invited to guest on dozens of radio and tv interview shows. 
W counters their arguments, however, saying that Worthing has its own pier, theatre and hospital, plus numerous interesting places to visit. 
I think the Worthing Tourist Board must be employing some VERY talented copywriters to work on their brochures!